My strong willed child.

I have four wonderful children. While raising them hasn't been completely easy, I have always thought that I have been so lucky to have such well behaved kids.

Sure, "I" has been a handful as a little one physically. He learned to climb at a very young age and hardly ever stops moving. I learned to anticipate his next moves and have kept him pretty safe so far. No broken bones at least.

Sweet PEa, however, has taken me completely by surprise. I used to call her my dream baby. She was so content as a baby and slept well. Things started to change as she turned 18 months-2 years old. She became super independent. She was very particular about things. She had a certain set list for songs at bedtime. If you sang those songs out of order??
Well lets just say you would feel her wrath. She craved routine and if things didn't go her way, there would be a complete meltdown. Eventually, I learned the warning signs and could most of the time avoid major meltdowns. I hoped and prayed that it was just her terrible twos and that when she turned three, things would just magically get better. Boy was I wrong. She had been three for exactly 4 months now and it seems as though things are getting worse. Lately I haven't been able to see her meltdowns coming and therefore haven't been able to stop them.

Can a three year old be Bi-polar? Sometimes I wonder about her. She can be completely happy one minute and flying into a rage the next. When she is happy, she is super sweet. A lovely girl. But I always find myself wondering how long it will last. When she is having a meltdown, there is no reasoning with her... No chance of getting her to settle down. Her newest thing now is screaming. She screams in short little bursts. Ear piercing screams that is. Also a complete refusal to so anything. Even if it is something she wants to do. For example tonight, She needed to go to the bathroom at my mother in laws. Jeff picked her up and carried her down the first flight of steps. That set her off. She had wanted to walk down herself. Jeff responded that he was sorry and didn't know. He set her back up the stairs so she could walk down. Nope she wouldn't have any of it. She started screaming and Jeff had to take her downstairs until she had calmed down enough to come back upstairs.

I am not sure why I am writing this all out. I just know that I'm at a loss and needed to get this out there. I don't know what to do with my three year old girl. I thought after having three older kids that I had this parenting thing down but she has definitely proven me wrong and so I am here. Completely at a loss.....