Monday, February 4, 2013

Thoughts going through my mind.

I have just re-read some of my latest posts. I realized that lately I have labeled my girl to the whole world on this blog and on Facebook. Even in talking about her to friends. I have called her a challenge, stubborn, defiant, demanding, unpredictable & explosive...How can those words with such negative connotations do either of us any good. These traits are the kinds of traits we look for in an adult. As adults we call it being assertive, committed, flexible, analytical, perceptive & dramatic. Those words bring a more positive light. Don't they? The problem is, these traits that are so desired as adults make for difficult child raising.

So what do I do? Well first of all, these traits are all traits that I want her to retain as an adult so I will try to view them in a more positive light from now on so that she knows that they are not bad. I will try harder to help her to manage her outbursts into more positive forms. I will apologize to her for labeling her. She is a smart, sweet, persistent little person. This doesn't mean that she won't see some discipline in her life. How else will I help her learn to channel those traits. But I will listen to her, show her some respect and I will pick my battles. We will come out of this. She is a good girl and I am a good mom. I will constantly remind myself that she is not doing any of the things to annoy me or to get a rise out of me. I do believe that she is testing her limits and I need to place those limits there to make her feel safe and secure.

I am not a perfect person. There are going to be days where I fail. Where I lose it. Where I need to vent about her. When those days come, please remind me of this post. When I feel as though I have failed. Tell me that I haven't. When I say something negative, remind me of the positive. I have come to realize that I need people. That everyone needs a helping hand along the way.

I have had people say to me that they have read my blog and realized that they were not alone. If you are reading this and you have felt alone I want to say you are not alone. Your child is not the only child to fall apart over their cracker being broken or their sibling touching them. My child does too. Sweet pea has completely fallen apart over "J" giving her a spontaneous hug and kiss. There are millions of moms & dads who go through these same things everyday. Just take a step back and breath. Tell yourself that they are not out to get you and that you can do this. You are a good parent. Be consistent and your child will grow up to be a successful adult.


  1. I suggest you post your blogs on our web site at the church Tash!

  2. How would I go about that Andrew?


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